Content guide
Skip for under 13
How I Met Your Mother S9 E1, “1. The Locket”, scores 3/5 for violence, 4/5 for sex and 4/5 for language, for an overall kid-rating of 4/5 — Skip for under 13. On their way to Long Island for their wedding weekend, Robin and Barney come across a startling family discovery. Meanwhile, Marshall sees something online that changes the course of his entire journey back east, and Lily confronts Ted about letting go of Robin.
Across the episode we counted 23 flagged moments in 8 themes: Sex & hookups (1); Nudity & bodies (1); Porn / strippers / sex work (5); Affairs / cheating (1); Violence & injury (4); Suicide & self-harm (1); Swearing (8); Alcohol & drugs (2). Every moment below is either a direct quote from the episode transcript or a short description of what happens on screen, so you can decide before you press play.
Watch for — every moment, theme by theme
Sex & hookups 1 moment
How Sex & hookups shows up in How I Met Your Mother S9 E1:
The day they got married, they lifted the curse forever, freeing me from the shackles of having sex with lots of different women.
Nudity & bodies 1 moment
How Nudity & bodies shows up in How I Met Your Mother S9 E1:
I just ate a croissant crumb that I found in my bra.
Porn / strippers / sex work 5 moments
How Porn / strippers / sex work shows up in How I Met Your Mother S9 E1:
- Stripper or strip-club material shows up in the plot.
That appears to be pornography.
No, the pornography's back.
What are you talking about? You just found out about James and Tom, and it totally freaked you out, and now you're asking this guy to point you in the direction of the nearest, dirtiest strip club.
No, Robin, I am not going to a strip club.
Affairs / cheating 1 moment
How Affairs / cheating shows up in How I Met Your Mother S9 E1:
You cheated on him.
Violence & injury 4 moments
How Violence & injury shows up in How I Met Your Mother S9 E1:
Hey, you just finished my Creepy telepathic murder thought.
And one grisly murder.
One "best man" plus one "no girlfriend" equals "Mothers of Farhampton, lock up your daughters!" Double guns! Wow, you're in bad shape.
Are truckers always beating him up? Yes, because he has to hitchhike with his middle finger.
Suicide & self-harm 1 moment
How Suicide & self-harm shows up in How I Met Your Mother S9 E1:
If I had to be here alone, I would kill myself.
Swearing 8 moments
How Swearing shows up in How I Met Your Mother S9 E1:
Here, have another sum bitch.
It's just gonna piss me off.
Hell, I've been going to Pilates.
My sweet, beautiful child who I haven't seen in a week whose head smells like love and unicorn teardrops, and why are trains so lonely?! Damn it, I'm looking! Hey, are you okay? You look stressed.
And he always makes us stop to see some weird roadside attraction no one except him gives a crap about.
You know, I don't give a damn about your photo.
I know I'm just a stranger on a train who you tried to bite, but do you want a hug? Lily! What the hell?! Ted and I had some road trip issues.
Okay, seriously, what the crap is taking so long with these rooms? It was like this last year.
Alcohol & drugs 2 moments
How Alcohol & drugs shows up in How I Met Your Mother S9 E1:
Let's show your critics you're not just a Dumpster on wheels full of drunk idiots.
It's not all champagne and frosting.
Watch With The Kids · You kids — your rules! · Informal parent guidance, not an official rating.